Man Purse of the Moment:

Prada 'Vela' Computer Case/ Messenger Bag

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Entries in Actor (5)

Saturday
Oct242009

The Art of Man Purse Analysis

Okay man-purse lovers, are you ready for the results of the 'Inside Simeon's Man Purse' contest? The winner was Courtney who suspected that he had a book, and a wallet! Great job, Courtney--you really have Simeon figured out!

Below are the juicy bits of details I'm sure you've been waiting for. By studying the contents of a pickup artist's man purse, perhaps we will all gain further insight into the complex art of seduction! (Is it possible that man purse analysis is an art in it of itself?)

The first thing that stood out to me in Simeon's bag was the razor. I'd like to point out that this is not just any old razor, but a borrowed razor. What does this tell me? A razor says that Simeon is a guy with a lot of facial and/or body hair. A borrowed razor tells me that Simeon is a charming guy - so much that someone might give him a shirt off their proverbial back, or in this case, a razor out of their shaving bag.

Another goodie in Simeon's bag is his dragon lighter. Does Simeon smoke? Nope. Was he a boy scout, and simply always prepared in case of emergencies? No, not quite. So what is the point of carrying this dragon lighter? I would assume that Simeon, being the gentleman that he is, is always prepared to provide the fire to light a future friend's cigarette. The fact that it's in the shape of a dragon tells me that Simeon might have played some D&D in his life (In my opinion, D&D can be a very handsome pursuit.)  If not that, perhaps it is a gift from someone who frequents renaissance fairs.

Did you see 'A Beautiful Mind'? Russell Crowe's character John Nash would totally use poetry like this to seduce Jennifer Connelly's character, Alicia.The last thing that stood out to me in Simeon's bag was his sketchpad. Does Simeon draw? Not from what I could tell, but instead of sketching in his sketchpad, Simeon crafts special graphical poems in a format he invented, called, Lattice Poetry. It's one (seductive) thing to keep a book of poems in your man purse (which Simeon actually did have, from a recent visit to City Lights Book Store) but to have a book of your own poems, in your own poetic format? Let's just say that Simeon puts the 'artist' in 'Pickup Artist'. Here's the complete list of items in his bag and my analysis of those items (Sorry fans, no feather boa's in sight!):

  • Sweater (shows practicality and planning for the future )
  • Sketch Pad (self expressive)
  • Toothbrush (doesn't want to offend those he's closest to)
  • CD & DVD (on top of pop culture)
  • Borrowed Razor (charmingly in control of his facial hair)
  • Multi vitamins - L-Lysine (Simeon told me that L-Lysine is good for stress/canker sores.  He did not say specifically that is why he took it.  Some of you may remember that the dinosaurs on Jurassic Park took Lysine supplements as well.  I don't know what that says about Simeon, but I just thought I'd point it out.)
  • Lattice Poetry (creative/inventive)
  • Screenplay (industrious)
  • Wallet (everyone's got this--no biggie)
  • iPhone (communication and relationship are important to Simeon)
  • Alleve (has arthritis?)
  • Napkins (messy eater)
  • Dragon Lighter (enjoys fantasy, very social, doesn't hate smokers)
  • Old Receipts (not comfortable throwing things away)
  • Chain w/ secret inscription from friend Alex (beloved to his friends)
  • Scissors (crafty diy'er)

So what do you think?  Is man purse analysis an art comparable to the art of seduction?

Coming soon is a self-submitted profile from my favorite ESL Teacher/travel writer, Matthew Crompton.

Tuesday
Sep222009

Vote for Luke Guldan!

I will soon be posting the results of Simeon's Man purse, but here's a sneak preview of the upcoming post on Luke Guldan, host of TrainersTip.com :

http://www.nbcnewyork.com/shows/lxnewyork/Hunky-Trainers-57702717.html#poll

Why don't you check out his video feature and vote for him at the above link? It looks like the contest is ending soon, so get your votes in ASAP!  I'm really looking forward to writing up his interview!

Thanks,

Christina (a.k.a. The Mursenary)

Saturday
Jun132009

Ryan Reynolds' Baggage (From Alanis to Scarlett)

  • Name:  Ryan RODNEY Reynolds
  • Age:  32
  • Sign:  Libra
  • Occupation:  Actor (X-Men Origins: Wolverine, The Proposal, Van Wilder, etc.)


Is Ryan Reynolds (literally) carrying over baggage from his relationship with Alanis Morissette into his marriage with Scarlett Johansson? This is totally man purse related, so I will unflinchingly proceed with this gossipy investigation.

Take a look at these backpack straps from when he was engaged to Alanis.

Image from JFXonline.com: "Alanis Knows How to Get Over a Breakup"

Now check out this photo of Ryan and Scarlett post-wedding.



Reynolds' baggage appears weathered and beaten-down.

It's the same BAG! Oh, Ryan, it's time to get a new bag. As much as I adore Alanis, it's simply not healthy to drag along the past--plus, updating your accessories is FUN!

Well, after doing a bit more internet research it appears he does have a new one, and It seems to suit not only his boho-indie facial hair...

Link to LeatherCraftstudio.com...but also works with this Italian newsie look!

Link to PopSugar.com

Okay, so now we've established that Mr. Reynolds has moved on from his weathered & hempy backpack to a newer, supple leather messenger, ( ouch, I did not intend for that to be a metaphor for his relationships...) the case is closed. Let's move on to the contents!

 


Here's what I think:

  1. Protein Powder, a couple of raw eggs, and a dash of creatine - He's got muscles. Those muscles demand to be fed!
  2. Katana - It's the ultimate accessory. What else can make you look more badass than a katana? Though if I carried a katana I might look frightened and maybe a bit bloody (I'm a klutz.)
  3. Flavors Of Entanglement by Alanis Morisette. It's pretty much all about him. According to some of her lyrics, he liked to overanalyze her (to her distress,) so I wouldn't be too surprised if he's scoped out a few of her songs. I wondered if he would be carrying his wife's 2008 CD, Anywhere I Lay My Head, but I took a listen and am not sure if anyone would be caught with that CD in their bag. Sorry Scarlett, I really like you in Ghost World & Match Point , but am just not digging the singing.
  4. A pizza place - For those of you who don't know, this is a reference to his 90's sitcom, "Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place" which eventually got shortened to "Two Guys and a Girl". What happened to the pizza place?!  I stopped watching the show by the time the name changed, so for all I know it's in his man purse.


Okay, that fourth one was pretty random. Sorry about that. But I'm sure you can do better! Leave a comment with what you think might be the fourth item in his man purse. Don't leave more than 4, and TRY to keep it PG-13.  Oh, and make sure you put in your email address (it won't be published, and I won't spam you) so I can get your address.  The deadline for this contest is Monday, June 22nd at midnight.

I'll choose a new winner next week, and I'll send them their very own What's In Your Man Purse mini pin!

Don't have any good ideas? Head straight to the merchandise page and buy your own pin (or t-shirt,) or watch this trailer from Reynolds' first film, Ordinary Magic (I totally saw this when I was a kid,) and find some inspiration.

Tuesday
May122009

Murse Matchup:  FABIO!

Fabio - On His Princely White SteedGuest blogger "The Always-Hungry Husband" here! Today, as our Head Mursenary prepares for a weekend satchel safari, it is my privilege to peruse the Submit-A-Man archives and present to you a Fantasy Four that breaks with tradition not only in its authorial composition, but also in its conspicuous lack of last names.

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen (and probably a lady again): Fabio.

 

 

 

Thank you Akila for suggesting Fabio to our Submit-A-Man. While he’s never been spotted with a man purse to our knowledge, it’s clear that a man of such prodigious accomplishments must have an appropriate accessory both for the carrying oFabio can melt hearts AND solder!f things, and, um, the looking of good. A metaphor, for your consideration: just as ol’ ‘sinistra e destra’ form the strong foundation of a triumphal Viking conquest-pose, so must Fabio’s manbag maintain the perfect balance of rugged masculinity and feminine sensibility that has made Fabio the undisputed king of romance.

Well, I guess, technically the title of "King of Romance" is disputed by one Englebert Humperdinck, but I don’t think this will become a dispute of or anything. Anyway – on to the show!

 

I’ve picked out a few man bags for Fabio:

 

Billingham Hadley Shoulder Bag Small (Sage, with Tan Leather Trim)

A compact shoulder bag with compact pouches, this Billingham Hadley Shoulder Bag is a small package for a big man. Disarmingly confident and cutely rotund, this is no briefcase in disguise! Insecure men: watch out, this bag is not for you!

 

Matt and Nat Carton Paltrow Bag

While maybe not quite as nice as Gwyneth, this Matt and Nat Carlton Paltrow Bag is no nonsense without being all business. Plus, it’s eco-chic and vegan – perfect for Fabio and his many causes, including his allegedly rescued dogs!

 

Ellington Otis Elite Hollister Satchel

An uncompromising bag; a bag that laughs in the face of danger; a bag prepared for the roughest adventure, and determined to look fabulous while on it. This Ellington Otis Elite Hollister Satchel is supple, durable, fashionable, and functional - truly an accessory to be reckoned with. Or, I guess, technically, "an accessory with which to be reckoned."

 

Rebagz Limited Edition Messenger Bag (Women's) - Tiger

A bag so raw it demands a narrative description:

"… breathless, with a fire in her bosom like the jungle’s own heat, Shayla froze as the long grasses parted, revealing the hungry eyes of the powerful predator. Her exhaustion melted into a frozen terror – but, as the lithe hunter drew closer to her, sniffing her, circling her, she submitted herself to him entirely, at the mercy of the perfect creature before her…"

 

Your thoughts? And don’t worry – we’re not done with Fabio until next week’s Fantasy Four!

Thursday
Apr092009

Fantasy Four: Zac Efron

Zac Efron With Beefy Brown Leather Man Tote and Bonus Man Pony Tail

I know one thing Zac Efron has NOT been carrying in his man purse - Q-tips.  But I won't post a link to that shocking photo that I'm referencing.  Too disturbing.  So, in honor of the premier of his new movie, 17 Again, here is what I think might be in that brawny leather backpack of his (I know it looks like a purse, but other photos show that it has two straps that he wears on both shoulders.)
  1. 24 Hour Fitness membership card.
  2. Scrunchies for when he's at 24 Hour Fitness, as seen in the photo.  I wonder if the top-knot will take off as quickly as his shaggy mop-style has.
  3. Hair product & flat iron for when it's humid outside.
  4. Wet Ones wipes for when he needs to sponge bath himself.  People say he doesn't like to shower, but let's let the pictures do the talking:  Is he enjoying himself, or what?  Honestly, though - I think the people spreading these rumors about teen heartthrobs going un-showered are clearly just jealous.
But really, Zac Efron is more than hair and muscles.  That's just what the imaginary contents of his man purse say about him.